


To Lover's End

by MissKaedex



Series: Obviously Canon [3]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Brief mention of yugioh and Naruto or so, M/M, Minor character death I guess, Parody, TorbZo, True love real sad tbh I cried
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 06:24:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16969362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissKaedex/pseuds/MissKaedex
Summary: Hanzo Shimada picked the wrong fight, for he had no idea Torbjörn has the power of God and Anime on his side.





	To Lover's End

**Author's Note:**

> This is a PARODY do not take this seriously.

"Give me your best shot, Dwarf!" Hanzo mocked, widening his stance slightly.

 

"I'm not a dwarf! I'm Swedish!" Tobjörn shrieked loudly, then suddenly he moved, launching himself towards Hanzo, speed so quick Hanzo barely caught it.

 

Hanzo quickly lifted his arm, guarding against the upcoming attack, the force behind the blow was so big it send a Shockwave through him, making the archers bones rattle. He focused his eyes and stared at Torbjörn who still had his fist outstretched against Hanzo.

 

"What?" Hanzo began, surprised of the force behind the push that sent him slightly reeling backwards. He put his hand on the ground, using it to skit to a halt.

 

He abruptly looked up, eyes narrowed. Then he smirked softly, a chuckle leaving his lips as he straightened himself up. "I have underestimated you, dwarf."He changed his stance, much more offensive. "I assure you, it will not happen again!"

 

With those words he launched forwards. Torbjörn dodged his blow narrowly, taking out some Kunai's and throwing them at Hanzo, which he evaded with ease. 

 

They traded blows from left to right. Suddenly Torbjörn skitted to a halt, clasping his hands together and quickly doing some gang signs, Hanzo watched in awe as the smaller man quickly moved his fingers about. Hanzo swore he had seen that stuff somewhere before. 

 

"Shadow Clone No Jutsu!" Tobjörn roared, suddenly there was smoke and 10 more dwarfs appeared. 

 

Hanzo narrowed his eyes at the subtitles underneath Torbjörn's frame, reading "Kagebushin No Jutsu!". He cursed, of course he knew that one, Genji would preform it all the time! It was from those Chinese Cartoons he saw on TV! 

 

Hanzo barely even blinked and they were already on top of him, beating him senseless. He anime gasped and cursed in Japanese for dramatic effect, then he grabbed the closest Clone that was charging at him, catching it by the neck, twisting it and tossing it to the side like a ragdoll. It dissappeared in a puff of smoke and Torbjörn halted. 

 

Hanzo gave the Swedish man no time to recollect himself, as he pulled out a scatter arrow and shot it at the floor. With a curse Tobjörn went on the defense, pulling a Katana out of his ass and knocking away all the arrows that flew towards him. Hanzo swore he could see red in his eyes. 

 

The other shadow clones fell until only Torb was left on the field. He stood sheathing his Katana. The wind blew dust up around them, scenery quiet and empty. 

 

"Scatter arrow, eh?" Torbjörn mused. "I always knew you were the type to meddle in illegal affairs, you are a former Yakuza after all."

 

"Shut up." Hanzo spat, putting his bow back on his back. "You would have done the same."

 

Scatter arrow was illegal ever since it had been removed from the game. His new ability already received a nerf, so now he would actually have to aim. 

 

"Where did you even get that from?" 

 

"None of your damn business!" Hanzo snarled. EBay. He had gotten it from eBay, he payed with PayPal, it took four weeks to be delivered. Shipping was a mess though. 

 

"Hn." Torbjörn mused, before raising his chunky daddy arm. "Let's end this!" He hissed. Purple fire engulfed him, swallowing him whole. A tall demonic Skelton appeared. 

 

Hanzo took a step back, tripping over his chicken legs. He had read enough Naruto from MangaPanda to know what this was. He had just summoned Susanoo. Hanzo was utterly fucked. 

 

But he had one more trick up his sleeve. 

 

He had to belive in the heart of the cards. 

 

He quickly reached into his pocket and pulled out a deck of cards. "Its time to duel!" He called, shuffling the deck, as 2000 life points appeared in front of him, same as Torbjörn. 

 

"I start!" He yelled, ignoring Torb's call of 'but I don't have any cards', he drew seven cards and slammed the first one onto his disk thing. "I play pot of greed! This cards allows me to draw two cards from my deck and add them to my hand!" He yelled and drew two cards, throwing another card into the field again. "I play pot of greed! This card allows me to draw two cards from my deck and add them to my hand!" 

 

"I play pot of Greed!" 

 

"Shut up, Dude!" Tobjörn yelled from across the field. "Everyone knows what pot of greed does! Stop explaining it every God damn time!"

 

But instead of feeling offended like Hanzo usually would he was smirking and threw three more cards onto the field. "Ha ha! You have fallen for my ploy!" He yelled evilly. "My Pot of Greed distraction, which let's me draw two cards from my deck and add then to my hand has allowed me to cheat the system and search my deck for my Blue eyes white dragons!" 

 

He summoned them, before throwing another card onto the field, a fusion card. "And now I summon, blue eyes Ultimate dragon!" Hanzo roared, throwing his arm to the side, he then pointed at Torbjörn. " And I choose to attack your life points directly!" 

 

With a curse Torbjörn went on the defense! "You can't attack on the first turn!" He yelled. 

 

"SCREW THE RULES I HAVE MONEY!" Screamed Hanzo, referencing LittleKuriboh's parody of Yugioh which is basically like Canon yugioh and everyone who disagrees can go fuck themselves, and with that he attacked him. 

 

The force of the beam of the dragon was so great that Torbjörn's live points immediately reached zero. He didn't even have the chance to fight back, for he did not have a deck. The only deck he actually possessed was the fairy deck that he stole from some chick while beating her in dance dance revolution. The deck sucked. 

 

He covered his face and cursed, before falling to his knees. Susanoo had disappeared. Torbjörn dug his fingers into the grassy dirt, closing his eyes tightly. He heard Hanzo approach, looking up slowly and his eyes widened. 

 

The man was walking towards him, Jojo out, swinging it around widely. He gasped audible. Hanzo was part of the evil Jojo gang. The most dreaded gang in whole Battle City! 

 

The dark haired man stood before him, swinging the Jojo one last time. "I win." He whispered, raising his arm, ready to strike him down with his Jojo. 

 

But the chuckle that left his lips let Hanzo halt. He raised an eyebrow, watching Torbjörn slowly look up, ugly smirk plastered on his face. 

 

"You are already dead." He hissed giving Hanzo barely time to choke out a 'nani'.

 

The swede moved so fast, he was blind to Hanzo's eye, suddenly he was behind Hanzo, Katana outstretched, he moved slowly, straightening himself up sheathing his blade. 

 

The younger man looked at him in slow motion, stuttering. "H- how?" 

 

There was no time for answer though, as Torb completely sheathed his sword with a low clunk. 

 

Hanzo cried out, as a wound magically appeared on his chest and blood spilled out unnaturally in slow motion. He dropped to his knees and fell face forwards into the grass. But he still landed on his back for a more dramatic effect. 

 

Torbjörn dropped his sword and rushed to Hanzo's side, grabbing his head, cradling his body in his arms, barely being able to fit his upper body on his thicc daddy lap. 

 

A violin started playing in the background, Sadness and Sorrow. This was too much for him, as he started crying hysterically. Snot and tears dripping onto Hanzo's face, who looked up at him in disgust. 

 

With a trembling hand he reached up to the dwarfs face. "Why did you do it?" He gasped, barely getting his words out and even coughing up blood!!!

 

"I wanted to test my abilities." Tobjörn choked. 

 

"Oh.." Was all that Hanzo brought out, looking away from Torbjörn. 

 

"I'm sorry..." The swede whispered, combing his hand through Hanzo's hair. 

 

"Fuck you." Was all that Hanzo whispered and with that Torbjörn leaned down and kissed him softly on his blood covered lips, Hanzo who was struggling to breath because of his punctured lung tried to turn away, but Torbjörn just kissed him harder. More desperate. More passionate. Weasling his Magnum tongue into the archers mouth. 

 

With a sharp breath he pulled back, looking down at the other man, his eyes dark and glanced over, all light gone. He sat there for about five more seconds before he started to become cold and his legs started to fall asleep, so he pushed Hanzo off and abruptly stood up. 

 

He quickly turned away and stumbled his way along the path, clenching his fists and closing his eyes. He had killed his best friend and his love of his life. 

 

With one last deep breath he started moving away from Hanzo, birds already picking on his body. He opened his eyes and you could see that he had activated his magekyou sharingan. 

 

His next goal was the Hidden Leaf Village, for he would become Hokage.

 

To be continued...

**Author's Note:**

> Swag. I have too much time on my hands.


End file.
